This year has got to be the one when i have done the most thinking and self reflecting in regards to what i am doing with my life and where i see myself in the next few years.
I look around and observe everyone i ever meet or have known and just think how i don’t want a basic life with a boring job i hate, with a wage i can’t live off and afford the simple things like fuel for my car or my phone bill or a date night with my husband to be, I don’t want to look forward to that 1 week abroad to Mallorca every year thats not what i want from my life.
From the age of 16 i got my 1st part time job in a sports shop and then went to college studied Interior Design and worked for Next to earn some money, 10 years of my life was spent working on minimum wage in retail for companies such as House of Fraser, Karen Millen and Pandora, this wasn’t what i wanted to be doing and I left to work as an estimator for a manufacturing company the wage was good and the most money i had even been on at £19k a year but this still wasn’t enough i didn’t want to sit in an office environment working in a job i didn’t like.
Getting the dream job in Dubai was my way of making something of myself and earning good money i would never get to earn back in the uk, except this wasn’t the case at all and to be honest if i knew what was to be expected i would have never have gone, i took so much money with me and have nothing to show for it, its a cut throat business out there and over 60% of people in Dubai are all real estate agents and thats a lot when Dubai is the same size as Manchester, it has the highest turnover of employees as nobody tends to stay longer than 3 months.
Returning back from Dubai i went to work for a high street estate agents and this is by far the worst paid job i have ever had as i would class myself as working poverty, after paying out bills, rent and fuel for my car i didn’t even have enough money to pay £2 for my carpark ticket at work every day and would leave my car at home to get lifts from my partner or mum even though the job was badly paid i still got up everyday and went as Ive been bought up to work and pay my taxes etc even though i was worse off for doing so.
This year has been the hardest for me and it still is now especially as i am soon to be 30 years old, I am reflecting on the past 14 years i have worked and thinking i don’t want the next 14 to be the same,I have no clue what i want to do as a job or a career, all i know is i don’t want to just pay bills and die because if thats whats life’s about then the next 50 years for me are going to be very boring and unhappy.
I am the type of person who gets bored easily who likes a challenge and a change, i hate routines when it comes to work and the same stuff just different days thats not me at all, i am an awful liar and if i don’t enjoy something its clear to see on my face.
All i know is i don’t want to live in England for the rest of my life as i feel it has nothing to offer people anymore, the opportunities aren’t there the work ethics aren’t there, the wages haven’t increased to match the rising house prices, cost of living is insane, bills, food and fuel are higher here compared to a lot of other countries, the average age for a 1st time buyer is 37 which is in my opinion ridiculous.
I am finding it hard at the minute as i feel i should have all this planned out and be happy with what I’ve got and just settle, but the worlds to big to not explore, my passport is their to collects stamps, my camera is their to capture images of a memories i can look back on and never forget,i want to live my life and enjoy it while i can who knows whats around the corner.
Sorry for the rant on life x